Perception

RLL 80: Choices, Consistency, and Consequences

RLL 80: Choices, Consistency, and Consequences

Recently, my stepfather recommended that I read a book called Rise and Grind: How to Out-perform, Out-work, and Out-hustle the Competition by Daymond John, and so I’ve been reading a chapter or so each day. In the book, one thought, more than any other, has stuck out to me. The author, famous for being on the hit television show Shark Tank and for being a mogul in the fashion industry (as well as for writing the best-selling book The Power of Broke), tells an anecdote about something his mother used to say to him which has to do with productivity. As he tells it, his mother used to say, “The time will pass anyway. Might as well use it productively.”

My wife and I at Covenant College, my alma mater and one of my favorite places on earth

My wife and I at Covenant College, my alma mater and one of my favorite places on earth

The more I’ve thought about this quote, the more power it seems to have. However, I’ve also been thinking this week about how this quote applies not just to productivity but also to the choices we make, the consistency with which we make them, and the consequences of them. See, we all are faced with myriad choices every single day: what to eat, what to wear, how to spend our free time, as well as less obvious (on the outside) choices such as what to think about, what we listen to, what we read or watch. And it’s those inner choices that I’m more concerned about, because the inner choices shape the outward actions.

As a high school teacher, I spend much of my day encouraging students to read. I try to convince them that reading is much more profitable to them as people in the long run that anything they’re doing on their phones. I want them to read books, magazines, newspapers about topics that they’re already interested in, and I want them to do so consistently. By doing this, they’d be helping themselves as well as the future of our society. It feels like a losing battle, but as teachers it’s our job to do the best we can.

Sometimes these dogs drive me crazy, but most of the time they make my heart happy. As Bill Watterson wrote, “It’s hard to be mad at someone who misses you while you’re asleep.”

Sometimes these dogs drive me crazy, but most of the time they make my heart happy. As Bill Watterson wrote, “It’s hard to be mad at someone who misses you while you’re asleep.”

Outside the classroom, I want to encourage you, the reader today, to take a few moments and join me in considering the choices that we are consistently making regarding our inner life. What are we choosing to focus on? What are we choosing to dwell on consistently? And what are the consequences of those choices?

Are we choosing to think about things that are loving, kind, encouraging, uplifting?

Are we choosing to think about things that are hopeful, gracious, and inspiring?

Or

Are we choosing to dwell on things that make us angry, sad, and resentful?

Are we choosing to dwell on things that make us full of hatred and bitterness?

I’m not saying we won’t ever have the odd thought that makes us angry or bitter or resentful; what I am saying is that we have the choice of whether or not to dwell on that thought, to allow it to fester within us. We can, instead, choose to re-focus our minds on something else. As Martin Luther once said, ‘You cannot keep birds from flying over your head, but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair.”

What we choose to focus and dwell on shapes how we respond to and treat others. It shapes how we see ourselves and the world around us. The many choices we make every day that no one even sees have a tremendous impact on the way that we interact with those same people. The consequences of the choices we consistently make are tremendous, so let us choose wisely.

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (Philippians 4:8)

These are wise words from the ancient world, and we would do well to remember them today.

RLL 77: Redeem the Time

RLL 77: Redeem the Time

This weekend I watched my older daughter coach her first soccer game, and it happened on the same field I played on in high school; the same field where I spent years coaching her and her sister; the same field where she played her first soccer game over a decade ago. I saw some of my high school teammates there, also coaching their younger kids’ teams. It was a great moment, but also one that got me thinking about the passing of time.

RLL 56: Christmas Crazy vs. Christmas holiday?

Real Life Leading 56:

Christmas Crazy vs. Christmas holiday?

Christmas season is in full swing this week, and that means many different things to different people. For some people it means decorating, presents, trees, candles, food, candy, travel, and family. For others it means sadness, loss, reminders of pain, isolation, or at least stress (also often related to family). This Christmas season, I want to give a couple of quick encouraging reminders: to slow down, and to rejoice.

One of my favorite things is getting to hang out with Bruiser at home.

One of my favorite things is getting to hang out with Bruiser at home.

The word holiday comes from the term ‘holy day,’ or a day set aside for a special or specific purpose. This Christmas season, I would encourage you to set aside time to both slow down and to reflect and rejoice: to see the beauty, to enjoy the company, to be amazed at the possibilities the future holds. In the midst of the crazy, let’s remember to slow down and set time aside to be reminded of Joy (one of C.S. Lewis’ favorite terms).

My world is complicated: being divorced and remarried (with kids involved) means that our schedule is hectic already, and it becomes even moreso when extended family comes to visit from out of town. As a school teacher it also means that this is exam time, and since one of my kids is in high school, it’s exam time for her as well. This is in addition to all of the usual Christmas season stresses mentioned above.

Because of all these things, I am glad to be able to remind myself and you to slow down, and also to rejoice. We should slow down because it’s the only way to enjoy what should be an amazing and encouraging season of the year. I’m not a huge fan of most modern Christmas songs, but I do appreciate that so many of them are positive, reminding us to be amazed and cheered by decorations, by kind greetings from strangers, and by the joys of the season. But if we’re going too fast, staying too busy, or trying to do too much, we miss it.

Even more importantly, I would remind you to rejoice this Christmas season. As a history person, I understand that Jesus’ actual birth was nearer to spring than to when we celebrate Christmas; however, that doesn’t make Christmas less special, any more than it would to celebrate a friend’s or child’s birthday on a different day of the year. This season is one that reminds me of the greatest gift I could ever receive: hope.

The most recent kitten rescued (and then given to a friend) by my wife.

The most recent kitten rescued (and then given to a friend) by my wife.

Jesus’ coming to earth—His life, death, and resurrection—all represent the greatest eucatastrophe (to borrow a word from J.R.R. Tolkien, meaning ‘good catastrophe’) in the history of the world. And that is cause to rejoice. This world is broken and fallen, and there are sorrows and pains that shouldn’t exist; yet Jesus reminds us that it isn’t meant to be this way, and that it won’t always be this way. His coming points us to a beautiful, wonderful future, full of blessings and joy that we cannot currently imagine. And every good blessing we have now is simply a signpost pointing us to that future.

So, when we get to snuggle with our kids (as I was blessed to do on Friday) or our pups (as many of us love to do); or when we are able to rescue kittens (as my wife tends to do); or when we see beautiful lights and decorations; when we are able to spend time with our families and loved ones; when we experience the joy of food and fellowship; when we slow down enough to appreciate these things, let us be reminded that these things are but a taste of what is to come.

Action Step: This week, take a few moments each day to consciously slow down to enjoy and appreciate the many blessings we have received, and be reminded of the joy that is still to come.